The birth of the blog - an unofficial genealogy
A jump-start - straight into the deepest void
I tried to start doing creative writing by choosing random titles - and got stuck with the first one: The saddest moment of my life? What can I possibly say about that after nine suicide attempts - having been born alive? I don't remember a saddest moment - the past three years seem to blur together into a prolonged saddest moment that seemed to last forever and which I would be happiest to erase.
The novel: Nine lives to die
The blog is intended as a diary of trying to struggle my way through the book I am writing- Nine lives to die. that is how many suicide attempts I had. That is the exact number I woke up to see that there are no Elysian fields, no heaven with a merciful God or any number of male virgins - it was simply the same sordid world I was trying so hard to escape from.
Right now, I have two parallel battle fines: my childhood and my latest love. the beginning and the end, closely tied up in a vicious circle I seem unable to break.
I have two parallel blogs, trying to hack my way through the jungle of survival:
- A forsaken soul living in a body that had been destined to die
- Unsent letters to a heartbreakingly beloved assassin
